We're taking bets that sometimes advertising just isn't appropriate...

Open Letter to the makers of Cocaine Energy Drinks

Dear Cocaine Energy Drink makers,

I applaud you for trying to be different. Naming your product after a deadly and addicting drug is definitely different. 7-Eleven was stupid enough to stock your product and at some point was smart enough to come to their senses. This is a wicked bad idea. (Yes I used wicked, I am from New England it is our thing.) It reminds me of the old SNL skit featuring Dan Ackroyd and Bag-O-Glass. It's a bad idea to name your product Cocaine.

Hey kids get in line for newest popsicles Crack. All the energy and none of the side-effects. Maybe we could even start Atomic Bomb the Cereal with explosions in every bite or even better we could have Terrorist a new drink from the makers of Coca-Cola... It's like suicide bombing in a bottle. Oh wait that goes too far? Cocaine Energy drink goes too far as well. It is offensive and not the least bit funny.

I understand you are trying to sell a product and get your name out there, but you do have a responsibility to be decent to the public. People can complain all they want about free speech, but this is too far. You are not being decent with this product name. It's like if Madonna was trying to steal a baby from an orphanage... a member of the House of Representatives propositioning a teenager... I mean Tara Reid having normal boobs. Well maybe I can't come up with a fictional example of something that is bad, but you need to find a better name. How about Arriba Arriba and you could have Speedy Gonzalez as your spokesmouse? Maybe my few readers have some ideas.